size matters
To be honest, I've not a clue what a six inch voice is, but when I saw this command taped to the wall of a middle school recently, I had to double back to make sure I'd read it correctly.And now I have to wonder, if you're a man with a six inch voice, does it mean you fall within other, less verbal averages? If you're Asian, would you have a three inch voice?
Do they sell devices on the internet to make your voice bigger? When your six inch voice cracks, do you get all frustrated and mumble something about how that's never happened to you before?
How about if you like the sound of your own voice? Do you fear you'll one day go blind from all that talking just because your voice is there and you can?
And yes, I know. Your voice can be big and loud when you want it to be. You might say yours is akin to an explosion. Or so loud only dogs can hear it. I've enjoyed the company of a big, loud voice before. It could best be described as booming, if one was wanting to sing its praises. Suffice to say I was left speechless the first time I heard it. Maybe even a little bit in shock. I didn't know voices could be that big. I do recall singing at some point, though.
In the end, I suppose it's not the size of your voice, but what you have to say with it. Here's where I used mine to write my shortest, lamest post evah!
posted by for a different kind of girl @ 12:45 AM
20 Comments:
oh oh oh, the double entendre is freaking killing me here!
What does it mean when a woman tells you your voice is "just right?"
I don't get it. Is the stuff you wrote supposed to be a metaphor for something else?
As long as we're discussing voices, I've always wanted to sing in a trio. Perhaps at church.
I've been told I have a VERY big voice. . .
Can voice-augmentation surgery be far behind? . . .
shortest? maybe
lamest? Not hardly..
funniest? amost definitely..and that was hard to do.
OMG! I was dying here..and all the old people are staring at me cuz I'm laughing my ass of at Panera, the only place I can get on without getting immediately kicked back off..
Stacie
If I let you hare my voice will you let me hear yours?
gwirow (sigh)
Not only is this an awesome post it just raised you up another notch on the lustable list.. you are above yourself again....
Would the use of my vader voice be just kinky?
no, no, no
it is not the size of the post that matters, it is the stirring of the blogosphere--and did you ever stir!
So, uh, FTN -
FMF or MFM?
Just askin'. . . ;)
Recovering - I hold a graduate degree in double entendre. I got it off the internet.
Chag - I hear that it's not so much the listening capabilities of the ear, either, so I quite think hearing your voice is "just right" that you've said all the right things!
FTN - One might use their six inch voice to talk about a good meal. So I hear. *I* hear it is quite the male interest to sing in a trio. I think I'd lose track of the voices and not know where to listen first.
Desond - I was pretty sure you'd chime in with your booming voice!
Stacie - Hook me up with one of those IC Mochas and a cinnamon crunch bagel the next time you're camped at the Panera!
Finished - You first!
Savage - Here I am, standing on my shoulders, yelling loudly down that I bet their is a fetish out there for the Vader voice!
Nanette - Truth be told, I dig the longer posts (heh). Alas, I also enjoy talking to myself a lot, too. Because my mom always said, if you don't have anything nice to say...but I always do. Like, as always, I dig ya!
Desmond - I'm still recovering from the big voices and now you're going to make me start thinking of FTN's trio choices! This afternoon just keeps getting better and better!
Trust me. I can spell. I have a tricky hold on grammar. However, I also am typing on a jacked keyboard and have kids climbing on me because they want to go on Neopets.com. Therefore, I blame the above spelling errors on things I've obviously learned I can't control....
ooh! burn on the asian voices out there! i'd rather discuss the african american voices. those are sweet. oh yes i did!
I wonder how big rachel ray's voice is?
Does it show my age to say that I immediately flashed back to one of those Mr. Microphone commercials from the *cough* 70's with the teenaged guy on the portable mike cat-calling at girls on the street "Hey, Baby, we'll be back to pick you up!" Even if you don't have a big voice, naturally, I guess there are ways to 'enlarge' it, huh?
Youdamom - oh, hell yeah, girl!
Lady - Rachael Ray's voice...she's definitely one of those who likes the sound of her own voice. I'd quite nearly say her's is unmeasurable.
SuperWife - I remember those cheesy Mr. Microphone commercials. I also remember *SO* wanting one as a kid!
Once again my words would only pollute the sentiment. Bravo once again.
This is not a lame post. This is the stuff of genius. I love it!
Ed - That's just being too generous right there, mister...
DFP - Well, "genius," eh? That's some pressure! I guarantee the next post won't measure up!
Oh shit! Leave it to a sexy woman to blow the line I used for years in the classroom. Granted, a smart ass student (who often cracked me up to tears) mentioned that he could get suspended if he actually did use the 6 inch rule: "We'd practically be touching noses and you'd kick me out for make'n out!" And now I'm jsut waiting for you to ponder if it's a 6 inch long voice or a 6 inch wide voice. Damn.
Well, i'd better go off and make new posters: "Don't let mean words come out. Use protection with your 6 inches." etc etc :)
Finding Heart - OOH! I didn't even *think* about the whole "length vs. width" aspect of a six inch voice. Dang! The places I could have gone with that
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