remember when tlc was called 'the learning channel'?

My kids made me record, watch, and physically retch so violently I could tell you what I had for dinner the night prior a television show featuring a woman who drinks her own urine.

Let me pause and take a sip of my delicious, sort of looks like urine if you squint diet Mountain Dew while you marinate over that.

A comforting cocktail, it says. Comforting cocktail. Oh, I'm not even gonna go all the places I could go with that one, if you know what I mean, and trust me, I could go many places.

Not only does she drink it, she also bathes in it, cups her eyes with it, ingests it through her nasal passages, and does something called 'urine packing.' That, friends, is a place I don't want to go. She does this not for survival, Bear Grylls-style, but because she thinks she's healing herself of disease, specifically cancer. The show led us to believe urine therapy is a thing, but it's not my thing. I prefer my meds over the counter rather than through the urethra, but OK for her, I guess...except, based on the look on the doctor's face in this particular episode, probably not very OK.

My kids ate this up (or drank it up, as the case may be), whereas I watched through split fingers adhered to my eyes as though I was watching a horror movie. When I came downstairs this morning, my youngest son was bringing a large cup of something that looked like urine up to his mouth and I screamed, but he assured me it was apple juice. Based on how often I have to remind the men in this house to flush a toilet, all I can do is hope.

I don't have a point to this post, nor can I think of other words right now that start with the letter P for a post all about pee. I just wanted to say that, for a night filled with great family television viewing potential, this one was in the crapper

(pee s - it should be noted that while I couldn't watch a lady guzzle her own urine, after the kids went to bed, I DID watch fake zombies rip apart screaming protagonists in what was an epic conclusion to this season's Walking Dead without any qualms)

(pee pee s - pee s? hilarious!)