orange you glad i didn't say banana?
A tip from me to you - Be sure to speak clearly and slowly when you phone your mother and ask her how to macerate strawberries lest you desire having her scream "WHAT?! You want to do WHAT WITH STRAWBERRIES?!" in your ear. This is especially important if you also plan to use the word balsamic at any point in your query. Additionally, enunciate if you are inclined to announce your intention to give the strawberries "a good forking." Planning accordingly cuts down considerably on the amount of time you might spend explaining yourself, and gets you to the good stuff, so to speak, faster.
You're welcome.
p.s. If anyone knows how to make whipped cream blobs look more enticing, I'd love a tip. If you just want to talk about whips, I'll smile and nod, but I'll not really be able to add much to the conversation.
p.s.s. My food play has never actually involved strawberries, and in fact may have peaked following a long weekend and a box of Cracklin' Oat Bran cereal.
Labels: i'm hot (not), sticky sweet
posted by for a different kind of girl @ 11:00 PM
42 Comments:
I macerated some strawberries this morning.
I felt so dirty afterwards I needed a shower.
But day-um they were awesome.
You couldn't work in a berry bush, a kumquat or cherry popping too?
I have no clue what macerated strawberries are, but you can bank on the fact I'll be googling it in about 2 minutes- that looks YUMMY!
Who doesn't love a good maceration? And is that angel food cake?? Be still my heart.
My husband macerated some strawberries this morning. I had to look away. Some things are best done in private.
Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. Tell mom to get her mind out of the gutter!!
Yum. I'd like some of that for breakfast :)
And if you're going to make me all slobbery the least you could do is post a recipe!
i'd like to masticate some macerated strawberries
YUMMMMM!!! And your mom is a pervert. It's ok, though, she probably thinks you're a pervert.
Does anyone ever really admit they macerate?
LOL... love it.. & now I want some cake... Looks awesome!
Dang it, Lime - you beat me to the masticatory punch. . .
Reminds me of an old bit from Mad Magazine when I was 12 or so (yeah, I read Mad Magazine when I was 12; so what?). A political campaign speech where the speaker accuses his opponent of engaging in 'countless acts of public mastication', and being 'obsessed with sects', and his sister was 'a notorious thespian', etc, etc. . .
But hey - I love masticating with strawberries. Often, Molly and I and all our kids will sit around the table, masticating together. 'Cuz that's just the kind of family we are. . .
I feel much better after a good Forking as well. Maceration is good in a pinch.
As for the Whipped Cream....try putting it in a piping bag with a star tip and twisting as you squeeze.
See what I did there?
Food porn rocks.
Wait, I thought "strawberry" was our safe word?
This post has ruined the movie 9 1/2 weeks for me. How can I ever enjoy the sexy-blindfold-food scene again now that I realize how much better it could have been with some Cracklin' Oat Bran?
Yeah, I'm with bejewell.... 9 1/2 Weeks was totally rockin' until you brought up the Cracklin' Oat Bran. Ew.
And whipped cream can be very sexy looking if you don't over-whip it... leave it a little loose and it will be absolutely lovely draped over your strawberry shortcake. Yum! I am definitely making this soon.
Cracklin' oat Bran? That sounds scratchy.
I do have a whip cream tip that really enhances presentation. Get a heaping tablespoon of your favorite whipped topping. Use another spoon to round off the edges, then lightly place it in the middle of a boob. I'm pretty sure I saw it on Martha Stewart.
All good advice here.
It reminds me of the time I told my grandmother that I hate Halloween make up because it cracks and smells like fish.
She peed herself laughing about my exclamation of my crack smelling like fish.
maceration should only be done in the privacy of your own room!
Your cream blobs might look better if you piped them out of a bag (all kinds of double entendre for your pleasure).
Innuendo aside, what looks really good whipped-cream-wise is if you have the swirls, (like soft-serve) trace them with a thin line of chocolate sauce.
I wonder how those taste
LMAO at Kat! Couldn't have said it better myself!
FADKOG...you make me hungry!
Unfortunately, my husband just *had* to show me a video involving reddi whip, therefore I can longer even consider whipped cream on desserts. (Resist the temptation of researching said video. You can't say I didn't warn you!)
I'm pretty sure I don't know what macerated strawberries are and I'm quite positive I don't want to know what went on with the cracklin' oat bran, but I might be inclined to listen to the talk about whips..I'm just THAT kind of girl...
I hope your mother recovered quickly from the shock...and I applaud your relationship. I was NEVER able to talk to my mother about forking strawberries. A conversation such as that would have sent her into cardiac arrest I'm sure of it!
Stacie
I had to google to find out what maceration was, and I was somewhat disappointed by the search results I got back...
I am drooling. Heavily.
I never thought I'd say this, but baby do I want to fork those berries!
Your mom has to get her mind out of the berry patch.
Oh, and you would have to show us this on the hottest day of the year. It's like August here, Hot Hot Hot!
my mother is losing her hearing so no matter what you say you have to be careful
Next time, take the angel food cake and gently slice off the TOP. Dig out a sort of "canal" in the cake, fill it up with strawberries and glaze (or custard or chocolate mousse) and then put the top back on. Spread the whip cream on like icing, or you can use actual icing. When you slice into it, everyone will be agog at your craftiness. And it's delicious.
Who knew strawberries could be so *sexual*?
please , no talk of macerating and forking until I've had a chance to gather change the batteries on Papa Smurf!
this was so 9 1/2 weeks!!!
I always go with banana!
This whole post went right over my head. I just got that there was some sexual innuendo in there.
ooooooh. okay got it.
clearly i need more sleep.
Whatever macerate strawberries are, if those are them, they look YUMMY!!!
I wish I had been able to hear that conversation though. Too freakin funny.
If you're going to be obscene, please speak clearly ... message on an answer phone. Nice one!
I've always found that whipped cream blobs look most enticing in my mouth.
That's my tip.
Please send your maceration tips over now in return.
I am slightly disturbed, but mostly intrigued -- oat bran cereal?
Also -- my daughter is obsessed with that knock knock joke.
Tears.Streaming.Down.Face.
OMG-that was hilarious-I'm still laughing.
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