i just realized i'm writing about similiar things two posts in a row. this is my life, friends.

Things you might want to wake up to on a Saturday morning:

• breakfast in bed
• the promise of a new day
  
• the arms of the one you love (IN their arms, not just WITH their arms)
• Ryan Gosling, Mark Ruffalo, and/or Russell Brand

Sounds good, right? Hell, even waking up with a stranger's arms in your bed wouldn't be all that bad if you could easily prove you weren't a party to the detachment of said appendages. If I could get a good night's sleep, those are exactly the kinds of things I would dream about waking up to.

Here's a taste of what I woke up to Saturday morning:

• my youngest son screaming
  
• my youngest son screaming the following - "HE FARTED ON MY CEREAL!!!"
  

Friends, you cannot come back from that. You cannot do anything but pull the blankets over your head and pray for divine intervention to help you get through the day before you've even set foot upon the floor to get it started. You cannot help but either stand in your shower and hope the water pelting your skin drowns out the sound of your tears, or count to 10 on a continuous loop to regain your composure as you come downstairs to the tears and apathy of those you live with.

It's been a long weekend around here.

The only saving grace in this whole tragedy? The kids were eating Froot Loops. Thank heaven this didn't occur over a bowl (or 'bowel')(but I figured why go for the cheap joke) of high fiber cereal.