this year, I also learned to walk and eat solid foods
I started blogging last September 13. On a dare. Well, not so much a dare, but for the sake of editorial freedom, I'm calling it that. I intended to be a "one and done" blogger. No one was going to read me, and really, I didn't think I had much to say anyway, so why go through those few steps to create a blog? I'd post a couple times, continue to silently enjoy the writing of others, and then hit 'delete blog' and say I'd given it a shot.
Welp. So much for that. One year and nearly 200 posts later, here you go. Me. FADKOG. Wordy. Very wordy. I should really be a writer. I wonder what that pays. Hmmm.
I'm kind of hooked on this thing that started out as a dare. Like I used to be hooked on having a routine to my days and an organized life and an empty TiVo because I was all caught up on my favorite shows so I could then read books. Instead I'm on the computer, writing about my panties and girly boners and quoting movie lines and song lyrics, and doing God knows what else and things I don't want you to know about.
I've picked up a few things along the way during the last year. Wanna hear some of them? Yeah? Ok. Here goes:
- There's never a bad time for a little Neil Diamond. Ever. You can't argue this point because you know it's a fact.
- My husband, who I'm positive reads this blog and has for almost its entire run, will continue to stay quiet about it. Hello, mister! Keep those hands limber. You never know when the nipple tweaking will strike again!
- Always take a moment and think about what you want to be called when choosing a name for your blog. By the time you get a couple comments, it's too late to go back.
- Sometimes, I've really got nothing beyond the BOOBS!
- Other times, it's just about the sex. But I mostly drop that on other people's blogs.
- The remainder of the time, I'm pretty sure I'm just here to amuse myself.
- I'm quite easily amused.
- I hope you're amused from time to time, too. I worry about these things. It's silliness, really.
- There's no right or wrong way to do this. If you've got thick skin, it helps.
- It's probably not logical to immediately think "Hey! This would be perfect for my blog!" in the midst of a family crisis, when bleeding is involved, or immediately post coital. However, I'm guilty of all that and more.
- Figure out your own voice and just write that way. If you ramble, then ramble. I love a good ramble.
- It's humbling and gratifying to discover how helpful people you've never met can be.
- I'll never understand code or HTML. Ever. And I think YOU think it's cute to watch me squirm.
- My blog roll is imaginary and right there off to the left of this entry. You're all on it.
- FTN is like a tractor beam. There are days when I think most of my readers, silent or not, are directed here from his place.
- The world is teeming with Grease fans. Those who find my blog by searching for "Rizzo quotes" or the lyrics to Hopelessly Devoted to You will be going to war with the Dirty Dancing brigade who also regularly find my blog through various searches for "baby, oh baby, my sweet baby, you're the one." However, my money is on the people who come here just because they think they'll find me naked and/or engaged in a threesome with some bizarre animal/human combo. Naked and dancing dirty with an ape to Hopelessly Devoted to You. People so rock.
- The power of the penis is mighty. Seriously. If you have one, you hold the key. If you don't, you may find yourself doing a tribal dance honoring it without even realizing what's going on. I'm just saying. How do you think I started blogging in the first place, eh?
- I like to write. I hope you like to read what I write, but if you don't, that's ok. If you want to see me on the back of a book jacket that you'd pay money to buy and then stalk me because you want my autograph on it, even better. I could use the money. And the attention.
- There's nothing necessarily wrong with writing your posts in all lowercase letters. Nope. Not at all.
- I'm a fan of the wordy. Shocking, I know.
- The posts you think will get the fewest comments will garner the most.
- Always appreciate but never take it to mean you're great when your comments start to rise. I'm not great. I'm just some girl sitting in my basement, typing a bunch of words. That you comment and say nice things in regard them is flattering and I really do appreciate the kindness you've shown me here and in chats or emails. It's you who are great.
- Yeah, big secret. I'm not always just sarcastic and snarky. What are you gonna do about it, eh?
- I like the sound of my own voice. I mean, just the one I hear in my head all the time.
- There will be giggling. And a lot of snorting.
- I love the people I've come to know here. Not Buffalo Bill, "put you in a pit in my basement" kinda of love. I'm not creepy, and I know it's creepy to go all "Oh, I love you. And you. Oh, and especially you!" But I think most of you know what I mean. Additionally, I miss those who were regulars here and had to, for whatever reason, depart blogging.
Sincerely, thanks to all of you who pass through here daily and leave comments and banter back and forth with me when I have something new to say. I do hope there are a few nuggets in here that entertain you. You've all certainly entertained and charmed me, in many varied ways. That you've put up with me is most gracious. Thank you for giving me this year.