pretend this is a prince song as I break my weekend down for you by the numbers

• 1 - Hour (rounded up from 52 minutes) I worked last Thursday before management sent me home thanks to my never-ending zombie virus.
• 5 - Total hours worked last week thanks to never-ending zombie virus.
• 28 - Estimated amount in dollars my paycheck for last week will be. You know what I could buy with that much money? More pointless Sudafed and cough syrup.
• 18 - Continuous hours spent glued to the same spot on my couch Friday. Seriously. You know that episode of Nip/Tuck when Christian and Sean had to surgically remove a woman from her sofa? I felt like I was one Hostess 100 Calorie pack away from being that woman on Friday. Also, am I the only person still watching Nip/Tuck?
• 3 - Times Friday when I thought about actually getting up off the couch for a Hostess 100 Calorie cupcake pack, but honestly, the even split in energy it would have taken to get up off the couch versus popping the three tiny crumbs of cake into my mouth cancelled each other out.
• 350 - Tissues used in the last week and a half.
• 90 - Ounces of Diet Mountain Dew consumed between the beginning of the day Saturday to this point on Sunday evening, which, in all honesty, should be illegal and at the very least deemed an incredibly poor idea when you consider the little incontinence issue still at play with this never-ending zombie virus.
• 2 - Basketball games I attended Saturday.
• 8 - Points my oldest son scored during his basketball game.
• 5 - Times I turned to my Tool Man and pondered how it is our son seems to know everything he needs to do before he even needs to do it when he's playing basketball, and yet I must remind him every day to change his underwear. Every day, people!
• 2 - Pairs of my oldest son's underwear I washed and folded today, which constitutes the number of pairs he's worn since last Sunday. Awesome. Oddly, I washed 3 pair of his socks.
• 6.37 - Amount in dollars my math shows is more than what the bank indicates should be in our checking account at this time.
• 0 - credit card bills I'm able to pay this month based on present standing of said check register, so my sincerest apologies Discover, Visa and MasterCard.
• 12 - Roses that arrived at my front door Friday thanks to my Tool Man and the fine men at DadCentric. You really helped my Valentine dodge a bullet this year, boys.
• 12 - Hours spent watching this season's episodes of 24, enabling me to be caught up with this show for the first time ever in my long and fantastical history with Jack Bauer. Additionally, I spent 5 hours watching recent episodes of the new 90210, for which I can only ask myself why?
• 1 - Naps taken. Alas, this nap was far too brief, achieved while sitting upright on previously mentioned couch, and punctuated by random thoughts of being too cold and disturbed by voices emanating from BBC America programming I was too weak (lazy) to turn off by exerting approximately 0 pounds of pressure on the remote control.
• 4 - Slices of toast eaten for dinner Sunday night. Four!? Four slices of toast?! Do you really need four slices of toast?! Excuse me for one second, won't you? "Mom, seriously, go away." OK. That's better. Sorry about that. The real reason I had four slices of toast for dinner is because toast is pretty much all I can handle without gagging thanks to the (say it with me!) never-ending zombie virus.
• 19 - Times I've watched this clip of the Jonas Brothers on SNL since it aired last night. My love for Joe remains strong.
• 1/2 - seconds it took for my Tool Man to be snoring as soon as his head hit the pillow Saturday night (aka - Valentine's Day, thank you very much). The fact that I presently gag on everything other than toast that I attempt to eat at this time may or may not be the reason behind this matter...
• Infinity - Times I've watched the following clip since following the link from @rainnwilson's Twitter page last Thursday:

• 0 - Actual blog topic ideas I have at this time and/or the amount of time I'm going to keep you all here reading this particular post.