things I just don't understand...
- Everything about the bids and games (except Plinko) on The Price Is Right.
- How Fiber One cereal sucks ass, but Fiber One chewy chocolate chip bars are fantastic.
- Why my oldest son thinks it's enjoyable to say "No" to me when I wasn't giving him a choice.
- Why I keep buying Madonna's new CDs.
- Most science fiction movies and/or programs. Halfway through, I have to pause the television and have my husband flowchart it out for me, and even then, I just nod and pretend to get it.
- Why the above mentioned husband thinks he's figured out Lost after watching just six episodes in the fourth season.
- How high school kids today look like teen models
- Why the word "high school" still makes me make a face like I just stepped into a horrific crime scene, slipped on the bloody entrails and gotten entangled in the corpses
- Why people I know but have hardly ever spoken to in "real life" want to be my Facebook friend.
- Financial reports.
- Why my husband shakes his head 'no' at me when I dry hump the Rock Band package when we go to Target.
- Why you'd buy regular old Oreo cookies when hello? The Doublestuff are right there!
- That fuzzy feeling in my gut when I see Robert Downey Jr.
- Why I feel I should use the word "tummy" instead of "gut," but just can't bring myself to do so.
- Why the guy I tried to help at the bookstore yesterday felt compelled to keep me in a disbelieving eye lock when I told him there was no way we still had a book in stock that his wife recalled seeing there. Two years ago. On a display in the front of the store. And all he had to go on was "it had photographs in it."
- Why I can't get rid of this cough I've now had for two months.
- Who Dairy Queen thinks they're fooling when you order a Reece's Peanut Butter Cup Blizzard, hoping you're going to get a treat of goodness like that pictured on the menu board, one laden with the two great tastes that taste great together, but instead end up with a sprinkling of candy on top and a vat of plain old vanilla at the bottom. Dairy Queen makes me a Bitch Queen.
- Why I can't find anyone who owns the second season of Dexter and is willing to loan it to me, because I can't find it in any library and know I'll never watch it again if I were to buy it.
- Precious Moments figurines.
- Buffets.
- Why my husband dawdles at buffets. The instant mashed potatoes are not going to get any better.
- My desire to have a comic book name.
OK, your turn. I promise you won't hurt my feelings if you say "you" in the comments.
Labels: please put back the bell bottom Brady Bunch trousers...
posted by for a different kind of girl @ 9:40 AM
38 Comments:
I actually have a friend who once won the Showcase Showdown on The Price is Right. Unfortunately, he was a destitute student at the time and couldn't afford the taxes -- so he ended up having to sell everything off.
Re: Dexter -- Netflix.
But now, the Mint Oreos. . . Mmmmmmm. . . Only, they seem to be a seasonal item. . .
And yeah - why do you keep buying Madonna's CDs?
Ask me sometime about my 'Jeopardy' tryout - it was a hoot. . .
And how could a certifiable song-writing genius like Sir Paul put out something as. . . good grief, 'lame' doesn't begin to describe it. . . as 'Wonderful Christmastime'?
BALLS!
Technically, I understand balls, I just felt compelled to shout out the word "BALLS!"
By the way, your comic book name is SuperTits McGee.
Ok I love LOST and Dexter.
The last episode of LOST totally pissed me off cause it's getting more confusing by the minute. And we've been watching it from the very beginning. And Dexter, you should be able to download season 2 from online somewhere. At least that's what Hubs does. I love that show and can't wait till it comes back on!
Oh and I hate double stuff oreos. I know GASP, but I actually prefer the cookie part of it, and not the center! lol
I've never understood why people pay extra money to get a fancy design on their checks. Why would anyone want to make the bill collectors' jobs more interesting?
Love this post! I feel the same way about the Oreos and Dairy Queen!! lol And Lost, yep, my husband thinks he has that figured out too!!
Yeah, when did high schoolers turn into super models? I don't recall being that hot or knowing anyone that hot in school. And what happened to acne? I still have it at 40 and these teens I know have the clearest skin I've ever seen. I hate them, I really do.
Totally agree on the Oreos - the Doublestuff are right there!
Dexter: Netflix. Or buy it used on Ebay, watch it, then resell it on Ebay.
I don't understand --
Precious Moments orHummels. Totally beyond my comprehension.
Why my daughter wants so desperately to be naked. At Burger King.
Living places with no change of seasons. Boring!
I remember when I was in my 20's I thought highschool kids looked so young. It always made me feel old. Now, in my near 40's, I couldn't tell a 20 something from a 14 year old. Its scary! Esp as a mom of a 10 y/o who is in the posing stage. HOLY CRAP BATMAN!
What I dont understand:
- why my cousin thinks I would even fathom moving to IOWA??? (hehe I know I will get slammed for this)
- why nothing ever looks, feels, tastes nor smells like the commercial or the advertisement
- why I make time for friends who live hours away, but not for the friends who live in town.
I have more, but I could go on all day, so I will digress and wait for a verbal lashing on Iowa. hehehehe
Oh, and yes, Netflix the Dexter, and I love Brunch Buffets!!!!!!!! Ok, not all of them, but when I find a good one, moooo-ve on over cause I aint leavin!
...why it took Google almost 4 hours to catch this feed today. I'm so late.
...why I always think it's funny when someone runs/walks into a pole or fence or wall while looking the wrong way.
...why I always think it's funny when someone says "pole".
I :heart: Dexter. There's something so sexy about him...perhaps it's all that emotional detachment and the sexy pecs and arms. Gah...forget that he murders people... ;-)
I've been catching up with the On Demand feature on our cable...Showtime has both seasons on Demand.
LOST! Sigh...Ilove that show! My guy thinks he's got it figured out 4 episodes into this past season too, what up with that? Men! They think they know everything! LOL
Robert Downey Jr *STILL* makes my knees go weak...dayummmm! Love that man!
Stacie
(yep, it's really me) :)
Don't have the brain power to come up with such a oool list but wanted to say I love your list.
Really, really love it.
And I agree about the buffet mashed potatoes!
Hallie
don't even get me started on the toolman and his daniel boone attitude with lost.
i love robert downey jr!
i have a cough too!!!!
we are so connected me and you. its sickening...
things i dont understand:
why is it that the weekend goes so fast but the weekdays go so slow?
how did adam get to be 16 tomorrow?
i'm at a loss. so many things i dont understand.
spam.
what the hell is spam in a can?
who thought it would be a smart idea to name chicken in a can tuna of the sea? i'm sorry jessica simpson just said outloud what i have always wondered silently.
i dont understand my microeconomics class.
there's so much more...i'll think on this and get back to ya.
I love it. I am going to steal your idea and write my own list.
(Dry humping the Rock Band? Really? Good thing my husband's already married, otherwise, he might propose to you.)
Mmmmm, Oreos! And the chocolate filled ones to boot. Mmmmmmmm!! (and this sucks cuz it's 10:30 and night and there are no Oreos in the house!)
Madonna? Yuck :)
Why do you keep buying the new Madonna CDs?
There are far too many things in this world I do not understand.
I don't understand how bending over to pick up dog poop is an invitation for an attack by the husband. Hello! I'm picking up dog poop!
I don't understand how I have less time now that I am not on the internet for hours a day. Hmmmmph.
I don't understand how you expect someone to have the second season of Dexter on dvd when it hasn't even been released yet. ;) Oh, maybe you mean someone that has illegally copied them, gotcha. Ha! Anyway...at amazon.com you can watch the episodes for 1.99 per episode....I know, you are looking for free. Sigh.
I love those fiber one chocolate chip bars! Yum! I even get the kids to gobble them up! :)
I too don't understand why I get the fuzzy feeling in my "tummy" when I see Robert Downey, Jr...or hear him sing.
I don't get the draw of the TV show Friends and I don't get why people go gaga over American Idol.
Don't be such a wimp. Unless you are planning to buy an Egg McMuffin from Mickey D's, you have nothing to worry about!!
Who's to say a few strange pbbuc hairs in our food isnt a good thing?
Hallie :)
Twobusy - I ever figured if I was on The Price Is Right and got up there, I'd always bet a dollar. Then, if I got up onstage, they'd not appreciate me because I can't see how those people muster up quite that much excitement and jumping around. Maybe they hand out crack at the door.
Des - Mint? Blech. I am not a fan of the mint. Now, if you were talking about those fudge covered ones though? I'd totally be there. Just like I would be there kicking ass on Jeopardy. I used to dominate that game when some friends and I would play nightly in college. That last sentence pretty much sums up how awesome (awesomely lame) I am! The second clue would be that, while I agree it's not great, I kind of like that Wonderful Christmastime tune!
FTN - (((swoon)))
FTN - I knew I could count on you, Baron VonBigBalls, for a most excellent comic book name!
Choppzs - I'm glad you're here, even if you don't do Doublestuff. Kimmy and I scooby gang each episode of Lost, and I still don't think I get it half the time. I've found second season Dexter episodes online, but they take forever for me to get downloaded. I may suffer for it, though, for I love that show!
Cocotte - Good point. It also reminds me that I need to reorder my somewhat fancy checks from one of those discount check companies!
Girlymom4 - Thanks for reading and commenting! My husband came home wiht one of those Blizzards last night for us to share (which is another thing I don't understand, why he thinks I'd want to share that treat!), and it held up to the half candy/half plain ice cream thing. I should just stop buying them, but one day I want them to prove me wrong!
Bunny - High school students today totally seem to be supermodels. Neither I nor anyone I went to school with back in the day looked like they do today! And don't even get me started on the zit thing! Thanks for the tip on Dexter. I found a second season preview copy on the cheap, but I think my chances are slim!
justlori2day - To be "that person," sometimes, I've been in a fast food place and pointed at the menu board and asked the poor kid behind the counter to "give me one of those. One that looks just like that." Then I probably shouldn't have eaten what they did end up giving me. Hmmm...Even though we're terribly nice in Iowa (ha!), I'm sure there's things going on back there in McDonald's I don't want to see!
I'm gonna have to get me a Netflix membership (or thrive on the free two week deal) and get me my Dexter fix!
BP Dad - I giggled when I read "pole" here. I also giggle when I hear the word "caulk." This is tough for me, of course, living with a man who is in the home improvement world. Don't get me started on caulking poles, man. Just don't...
Laura - Ah! I've never done the On Demand feature. I'll have to look into that, too. I'm so hooked on this show! I think it's the killing for good that gets me. Oh, sure. Mostly it's his smirky nature!
Stacie - No kidding, right? But I bet Robert Downey Jr. doesn't act like he knows everything. I bet he's perfect!
WWW - And I don't even want to think what lurks inside those buffet mashed potatoes, thank you very much!
kimmy - Oh, we are so connected, you and me. I could say A LOT of things that I think of when I hear words like that, most of which involve a camera and lots of request for someone to be naked whenever they were comfy, but I shall refrain...
No kidding about Tool Man though, right? Freakin' thinking he's Freddie and we're just his damn Scooby Gang. Whatev, Tool Man. Whatev!
Happy Bday to your Adam!!
Mandy - Seriously. I have it bad. I sometimes lick the sales circulars, too. I NEED Rock Band. It's just come down to that! I'll be coming by to read your list sometime!
Wethyb - I can't have Oreo's in the house simply for the fact that no one else would ever get any. But oh, those chocolate ones...
Chag - I have actually refrained from buying the lastest one. I've only heard the new song once and I was all "Hmmm. Whatever." Now I need to hold strong to that feeling. I never thought that woman would still be around at this point when I first heard "Like A Virgin." I guess, in buying the cds, I get part of the blame.
Bee - Oh, don't EVEN get me started on that, Bee. I can't even read the damn newspaper or eat a piece of toast in peace some mornings as I lean over the kitchen counter. But wow, I think you actually have it worse, because really? Dog poop duty!?
Nan - HAHAHAHA! Um, I thought it was out already! And I work in a book/music/dvd store! I should know better! I confused myself by seeing the episodes were available "online" already! Who's lame? Yeah, me. Beats being a fool, though!
(I miss ya, sweets!! Love ya!!)
Bogart - Ah, are you giving me a bad time about my Robert Downey Jr. lust, mister! That's ok, because I totally respect you, and completely agree about that AI thing. I just don't get it, either!
WWW - I suppose it could be counted as fiber, but seriously, those Fiber 1 chewy bars are a hell of a lot better!!
Don't forget Oreo Cakesters....
If you don't understand Precious Moments figurinesm you really wouldn't understand Willow Tree figurines -- they don't even have faces! But I collect them anyway.
I don't understand why FTN would think he'd even want to have sex after running a half-marathon.
It would probably be quicker to just list things I do understand...
doublestuffs are the best.
I love LOST, I'm completely confused now, though - I MUST have missed something somewhere...
I would totally buy the 2nd season of Dexter so you could borrow it, but I have to get the 1st season first. My suggestion? (If you have one) Movie Trading Company. You can rent it, or you can buy it, and bring it back for purchase price minus the rental fee... I don't even rent movies anymore - I just buy them and take them back!
Therese - Oh...sweet, sweet Oreo Cakesters...high calorie love of my life...totally trumps the Doublestuffs!
Phyllis - I have a few of Willow Tree figures, and can totally take those in small doses, probably because I appreciate the lack of cutsie sayings on them. I used to work for a nonprofit that gave away Precious Moments as incentives. I was swimming in them. Blech!
...and seriously on that whole FTN/sex after a half marathon thing! Dude just wants something to blog about come Monday, I bet!
Melody - Ha! I got school on that whole Dexter Season 2 isn't out yet, but I've come to love that show so much, I've gotten hyper about it! I haven't called around to any of the video places around here to find out if they stock it, but I should do that when it comes out! I wish we had that business you mentioned here. That's not a bad deal! Good to see you here again!
Your comic book name could be
The Scarlet Rack.
I know I'm a tad late but I wish I was the rockstar package at your local Target....
Yep, still lusting you....
Ed - That does have a certain ring to it!
Savage - Oh, really, when I do it, it's not a pretty sight. I'm shocked they still let me in the place, really.
Right now I can't understand WHY it might not be considered a good idea to deal with another disastrous parent/teacher conference by drinking a bottle of straight Malibu dreckly from said bottle (hic).
I have one...
I dont understand why it is going to snow again tonight, and it is May 2nd! (of course I know it wont last, but come on already!!!!!!)
I don't understand why I can't eat whatever I want every day without gaining weight.
I think I like your list better.
i don't understand why Meredith won't marry McDreamy on grey's anatomy. what the hell is her deal,man!!
and i will never understand how Kelly Taylor could steal Dylan McKay from Brenda Walsh-her supposed FRIEND! Oh, the humanity! I will NEVER understand that, Diff Gal!!! :)
1blueshi1 - Amen, my friend...amen...
justlori2day - upon which I can say amen again, my friend...amen...
madwoman meg - I can't understand why a tiny bag of peanut M & M's has nearly 300 calories and yet, that doesn't dissuade me from craving them.
katie - AMEN! And I'll never understand why David Silver would dabble in drugs when he had the love of Donna and the success of the Pitchpit After Dark at his fingertips. I'll never understand why I laughed when I watched Andrea get hit by a car, and why Brandon just never tossed her a bone once in awhile. Amen, my friend...amen...
You can watch streaming episodes of Dexter at www.tv-links.cc I'm sure it's not particularly legal, but if that's ok with you... It works pretty well as long as your internet is pretty fast.
Anonymous - sometimes you gotta look the other way...
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