...for a different kind of girl

silent surburban girl releasing her voice, not yet knowing what all she wants to say about her life and the things that make it spin. do you have to be 18 to be here? you'll know when i know.

Thursday, January 07, 2010

we goin' ridin' on the freeway of love

Before I get started on this post, let me apologize for once again writing about video games, which, if we travel way back in my time machine (Mmmm...smell that? That's that new time machine scent!) to late December 2009, we'll see they were also the subject of the last post I wrote. In that post I shared that, thanks to Nintendo's semi-hostile takeover of my home, it has been nothing but non-stop gaming here for almost two weeks. My sons each now have their own DS systems, and we also now have a Wii, which my Tool Man has become quite enamoured with. If I wish to find any of them at any given time, I need only follow the sound of bleeps and bloops blasting through the place.

(sidebar - As I try to write this, my 7 year old is sprawled on the couch next to me playing Super Mario Brothers on his DS, my 12 year old is on the love seat busting the chops of someone on Smackdown VS Raw 2009 on his, and between the noise, them talking to the screens, and the voices in my head asking me when the kids' bedtime is because they want to snag one of those systems and play Cooking Mama, I seriously can not think.)

Tool Man seems to be most in love with MarioKart, and has spent countless hours improving his methods and puffing up his chest each time he dominates a race. "Oh, that was a pretty hard one," he'll say (and that's what she said, too) after conquering a course, and as he's blinking his beady little bloodshot eyes to regain the moisture lost from staring nonstop at the TV screen for so long, I'll glance up and notice he's come in first in every race he's played, and I'll sneer "Oh, yeah, Ricky Bobby, that was REAL hard."

(and then I'll say "That's what she said!" again, because, oh, that NEVER gets old!)

On New Year's Day, my king of the road, apparently forgetting the way my poor muscle coordination (which I could perhaps improve if I ever got a moment on that damn system to work out with my Wii Fit) makes me all flippy floppy with the game remote, asked me if I wanted to join him on a game of MarioKart. I was intrigued and excited by the possibility the request was his way of letting me know one of his resolutions for the new year was to spend less time making whoopWii and more time racking up the high score loving points with me, so I immediately dropped what I was doing and grabbed his remote.

His ACTUAL remote.

Because I didn't make any resolutions about more loving quality time, because I'm good on that one, thank you very much.

Even though I may have yelled something about "IN YOUR FACE!!"

And he may have responded with "That's what she said!"

And then that just grossed me out.

But anyway...


I immediately dropped what I was doing to join him and listened intently as he gave me tips on the best vehicle to pick for the character I chose to play as (Miss Peach, in case you're curious), and where to look ahead on the course to better take out other opponents. After a few games, I really thought I was getting the hang of things and doing reasonably well, and because Tool Man and I were playing on the same team, my heart was racing with pride and devotion almost as fast as he raced his Mario around Rainbow Road and through Coconut Mall. When Tool Man is intent on something, he sticks the tip of his tongue out and folds it under his lip, and when I could spare a glance over, I noticed he was doing that and I found it so adorable that all I wanted to do was throw my remote aside and get to some shakin' and bakin'.

That feeling only intensified as we put the pedal to the metal and I realized he was yelling "Go, baby! Go, baby, go!!" over and over again during various course, and I was thrilled to think he was cheering FOR ME (and Miss Peach) as I attempted to improve my pole position in Waluigi Stadium, which only made me try harder to take out that annoying Donkey Kong every time he attempted to edge me out. For three or four races, Tool Man's cheers of "Go, baby! Go, baby, GO!" continued, and his awesome sportsmanship was really turning me on.

However, on the fifth race, as we skidding along the frozen terrain of Sherbert Land, and I was preparing to thank Tool Man for all the support and encouragement he was giving me (and Miss Peach), I stole a glance toward his screen as his tongue was darting all over the place and he was screaming positive affirmations, and noticed he was - and had been - cheering "Go, baby! Go, baby, go!!" TO HIS OWN CHARACTER!!!

Not to me (and Miss Peach)!!

When I realized that, I waved a black penalty flag to send Tool Man back to the pits, and God bless him and his attempts to get a green flag back onto my course, there was no victory lap for him that night.


In between sneaking on the Wii to practice my MarioKart skills so I can get all up in Tool Man's face and make him say "I love crepes," I've also been doing some thinking and I wrote about my thoughts for Polite Fictions 2.0. This time, instead of an ongoing narrative, we're each putting our own self-contained spin on one theme, and we're starting big with The Afterlife. If you're so inclined, please go read my contribution and give me some feedback there. Also, kick your shoes off and stay awhile so you can read some beautiful words written by the others who haven't yet kicked me out of their far superior home. I appreciate, and I know they do, too.



Blogger WILLIAM said...

Mario Kart the new aphrodisiac

Thursday, January 07, 2010 1:22:00 PM  
Blogger The Savage said...

I've never even touched a Wii before.... (That's what she said!)

Thursday, January 07, 2010 1:35:00 PM  
Blogger just making my way said...

We got a Wii awhile back...and then the tv broke. No doing so much Wii-ing.

I promise to get to Polite Fiction soon - I'm so happy to hear you are continuing the journey! But at the moment I am at work and reading about the Afterlife might make me weepy, so I'm saving it for home.

Thursday, January 07, 2010 2:25:00 PM  
Blogger Brian o vretanos said...

My daughter and I went through a similar craze with SuperTux Kart on my computer - I even bought games controllers specially. I'm too scared of their addictive qualities to buy an actual games machine.

Thursday, January 07, 2010 2:34:00 PM  
Blogger Aunt Juicebox said...

It was a snow day today so my daughter spent six hours playing zelda on wii, until I kicked her butt off so I could watch some tv. Dang kids, bogartin' all the good shizz.

Thursday, January 07, 2010 3:11:00 PM  
Blogger Under the Influence said...

Man, I truly SUCK at MarioKart!

Thursday, January 07, 2010 3:21:00 PM  
Blogger Ally said...

I suck at MarioKart so badly. I'm not a good driver in real life. I bought my husband Super Mario and he thinks I may do better with that. I loved Mario for Nintendo 64 back in the days, who knows.

My game is ROCK BAND - as long as I'm on the mic :)

Tales Of A Fourth Grade Nothing

Thursday, January 07, 2010 3:36:00 PM  
Blogger TwoBusy said...

I'm not sure if you just talked me into or out of buying a Wii.

Thursday, January 07, 2010 4:53:00 PM  
Blogger Craig said...

We got our Wii last Christmas, and somewhere in the intervening year, MarioKart appeared, arriving from points unknown. And my kids LOVE MarioKart. Forget Guitar Hero, Rock Band, or anything else (except maybe the Wii Bowling); only MarioKart.

And yeef - you shut him out of the Sweet Lovin' over MarioKart?? Yer a harrrd woman, my dear. . . (yeah, yeah, I know. . .)

My Christmas haul this year included Beatles Trivial Pursuit. Did you know that Phil Collins was one of the Teenage Throng in A Hard Day's Night? Yeah, me neither. . .

Thursday, January 07, 2010 7:37:00 PM  
Blogger Always Home and Uncool said...

I can't play Super Mario Bros on Wii with my son anymore. He yells at me for my incompetence too much.

Little creep.

Thursday, January 07, 2010 7:42:00 PM  
Anonymous A Vapid Blonde said...

Oh I want a wii so bad...tell me more...talk wii to me!

Thursday, January 07, 2010 8:59:00 PM  
Blogger Mad Woman said...

I am the reigning Mario Kart and Wii Bowling champion in this house. I'm all "in yo face" to everyone else.

I just got Wii Fit today as a reward from my dad...can't wait to humiliate myself on it.

Thursday, January 07, 2010 10:10:00 PM  
Blogger Christina Lee said...

who knew MarioKart could be sooo sexy ;-)

Friday, January 08, 2010 6:42:00 AM  
Blogger Tuesday Girl said...

my husband and I are ADDICTED to super Matrio Bros on wii and secretly play every night after the kids go to bed.
I swear.

Cooking mama rocks!

Friday, January 08, 2010 7:37:00 AM  
Blogger Petra a.k.a The Wise (*Young*) Mommy said...

Have you read my posts about Wii Mario Kart and what my husband and I do? Yeah, it's oh so dirty and oh so fun. We play almost EVERY NIGHT. Love it!

By the way, five days until Nick J and The Administration!!! I am going to take LOTS of pictures for you, and I might even get to meet him, just so I can say that FADKOG said "hi." ;)

Friday, January 08, 2010 8:23:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love the Wii Fit, but as for the rest of the games, not so much. I don't do video games with the 'push this button to do this and not that and you didn't do it fast enough' crap. After one attempt at Super Mario Bros with my J in which my little toad stool character died four times within about thirty seconds I said, "Never again." And have not been back. Good luck brushing up on your wii skills. kick some Tool Man butt!

Friday, January 08, 2010 10:04:00 AM  
Blogger Chasity said...

I firmly think between my facebook addiction and blogging, if I purhcased a Wii, I might not ever be seen in public again. And that, my friend, is not good at this juncture.

Friday, January 08, 2010 10:58:00 AM  
Blogger Bex said...

we got mario kart but only gabriel plays it. looks like i need to brandon on it after the kids to bed. hummm-ina-humm-ina.

Friday, January 08, 2010 12:45:00 PM  
Blogger Legallyblondemel said...

Oh, so you "improved your pole position", did you?

Thank you - I haven't had a good, adolescent-boy-style snicker in too long.

Friday, January 08, 2010 3:23:00 PM  
Blogger Mrs. Booms said...

As I write this, my man is sitting downstairs playing the baseball game I gave him along with Madden 10. When he opened them he uttered, "you know you're not going to see me for a while, right?"

Friday, January 08, 2010 8:47:00 PM  
Blogger Heather said...

Good to know. I got my pants so tight at Cracker Barrel on my road trip.

Friday, January 08, 2010 10:47:00 PM  
Blogger anymommy said...

There are no video games in this house. This post might explain a lot to my husband...

Saturday, January 09, 2010 12:02:00 AM  
Blogger bernthis said...

i love paying games with my kid. We don't do video but it's a good time for both of us

Saturday, January 09, 2010 6:11:00 PM  
Blogger Laggin said...

Gotta go....we need Mario Kart!

Saturday, January 09, 2010 9:55:00 PM  
Blogger WhisperingWriter said...

I am so bad at Mario Kart. I always end up stuck in the wall.

Sunday, January 10, 2010 1:25:00 PM  
Blogger MandM Mom said...

The last video game I touched was the original Mario brothers & before that Atari, bring on space invaders...

Sunday, January 10, 2010 3:39:00 PM  
Blogger Chag said...

You need to come over and play. No one at my house will play me.

I've been playing Super Mario Bros lately. Treated myself to an early birthday present.

Sunday, January 10, 2010 7:58:00 PM  
Anonymous A Vapid Blonde said...

I gave you a little gift over at my blog...because you are special.

Sunday, January 10, 2010 8:49:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mario Kart is like crack. First we hooked the kids then we proceeded to fall into the vortex. Still haven't crawled out but from what I can see the house needs to be condemned.

Sunday, January 10, 2010 9:14:00 PM  
Blogger lime said...

i think i am glad mr.lime is not crazy for our wii. that's our son's purview.

Monday, January 11, 2010 6:18:00 AM  
Blogger Pat said...

I was getting turned on myself, thinking that your hubby was cheering you on! Great foreplay! Then, dun,dun,dun, he's cheering for himself? Why I oughtta....!!!!

I've been wanting a Wii game for the Wii fit part of it. But first I need a lap top. Just add that to my wish list.

Monday, January 11, 2010 10:17:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Before my husband and I were married, we used to play Cool Boarders 3, together. He would spend all week trying to get the highest score. Then I would come over on the weekend and completely obliterate his efforts, which would totally piss him off. Ha!

One night he stayed up until 4AM trying to beat my latest high score. When he did, he called me and, without saying hello, said, "15,876 BITCH!" and proceeded to slam down the phone.

That was when I knew it was love.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010 8:18:00 AM  
Blogger thatgirlblogs said...

All I wanna say is it's nick jonas month. seeing him on the 30th, sigh.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010 12:14:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

My husband & I have spent obscene amounts of time racing each other on MarioCart. I love being Daisy, she has the most awesome attitude. And for some reason, the only track I can dominate is Rainbow Road. It was what we used for "therapy" the day I left work early when I was having a miscarriage. The power of MarioCart should never be underestimated!

Wednesday, January 13, 2010 6:18:00 PM  
Blogger Heather said...

My kids absolutely LOVE Mario Kart. We just got Super Mario Brothers for Christmas and have been having fun with that one as a family too.

The big kids got DSs from Santa and I play the games I bought for MYSELF after they are in bed. (Brain Age and Cake Mania)

Wednesday, January 13, 2010 10:51:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

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Joan Stepsen
Tech gadgets

Thursday, January 14, 2010 5:34:00 AM  
Anonymous the weirdgirl said...

Ah, our household too. At least my son and husband are constantly playing Super Mario Bros. (Actually, I kind of like the quiet.) I've thought about trying the Wii Fit... but then I'm just giving in to the cult.

Thursday, January 14, 2010 6:07:00 PM  
Blogger Carolyn...Online said...

I keep falling off the planet on Super Mario Galaxy and my kids yell at me. It's worse than pong.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010 7:32:00 PM  
Blogger Cocotte said...

We don't own a Wii, X-box, or any type of game station, so I'm really in the dark here.

But where you been??

Wednesday, January 20, 2010 5:58:00 AM  

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