there’s a girl starting to realize eternal fate has turned it's back on her
I'm coming off one of the most boring weekends in recent history, and when you consider most of my weekends involve cleaning toilets while dancing to Golden Earring's Twilight Zone, you'll understand why the fact that I spent the bulk of my time over the three-day emerging from a coma to watch crab fishing marathons and cannibalistic soldiers gave me plenty of time to ponder the following:
- Why I have a freakish, encyclopedic knowledge of all things Jonas Brothers.
- My cougar-like attraction to Joe Jonas, particularly his viral eyebrows, which look like they could provide warmth to a small Icelandic village or perhaps speak to his raging testosterone levels.
- Why people who never spoke to me in high school now wish to be my friend on Facebook
- Why my mom wants to be my friend on Facebook
- Why my husband doesn't want to be my Facebook friend
- (But I made him. So there, Tool Man! Take that!)
- Why Tool Man and I had an entire conversation via Facebook Saturday afternoon while seated two feet from each other.
- How I like to say "Oh, we holidayed in the Hamptons, luv," when asked what I did this weekend.
- How my boredom must make me really annoying to people.
- Wait until my new Facebook friends find that out! No wonder Tool Man didn't wanna be my friend!
- The allure of Stephenie Meyers' books. Blech, blech, blech. Did I mention I found them to be blech? Super blech.
- My lack of inspiration.
- How guilty I'll feel knowing you read this and there's really not much here.
- My insane guilt issues.
- Why must the Cha Cha Slide and Cotton Eyed Joe be played at every party I ever go to.
See? BORING! Boring but jaunty, because it should be put out there that I can now rock it to the Cha Cha Slide, thanks to my oldest son, who taught me the steps he learned in gym class, and I was all "What? Why, back in my day, we played volleyball and ran laps until we cried, and you're re-enacting every wedding reception and graduation party I've ever been to in gym class?" But I'm just saying, in the event you wish to invite me to a party, I'm willing to get things started on the dance floor. Just know that I'll be that annoying one screaming for some Jonas Brothers.
Labels: I'll come up with something...
17 Comments:
If nothing else, your blog is keeping me current on pop culture. I now know what a Stephanie Meyers book is.
And um.....FADKOG.....are you going to the "wild & wonderful state" to party or what? Cotton Eyed Joe?? Really???
"Back in the day," once a week we square danced in gym. My favorite was the Salty Dog Rag.
I need to go to more parties. My toes twitched one step to the left when the Cha Cha Slide was on, and Cotton Eyed Joe made me feel like do-so-doeing. In my day, gym class was conducted in squads and we threw dodgeballs at each other. Dancing sounds like more fun.
We square-danced in elementary school gym. My, how things have changed. Although I did take a "Jazz and Disco Dance" mini-course in sixth grade. There's a picture of me doing "The Hustle" in my sixth grade yearbook.
Perhaps I shouldn't have mentioned that.
P.S. Wanna be my Facebook friend?
Poke.
Poke.
Poke.
God, I was MAROONED by the DH in front of Deadliest Crap ALL DAY Sunday. And Monday. And I'm all, Do I not the Tivo the hell outta some Law & Order: SVU in the hopes of catching more glimpses of Stabler's tattoos over the weekends? YOU CAN'T TAKE AWAY MY REASON TO LIVE, DUDE!
I would totally not be his friend on Facebook (the DH, NOT Stabler.)
So he completely forced me onto eBay to shop for shoes (the DH, not Stabler.)
Diff Gal-You always make me laugh even when you think you aren't saying much! You are a dadgum hoot, g-friend!
I just finished The Host by SM and the trick is to shut off half your brain. ;op
I like her stories but I feel like I'm back in 3rd grade.
Andy and I IM or text while in another room all the time. It keeps the romance alive since he doesn't like typing too much so I win all the arguments.
Who are the Jones brothers?
Can you tell me why you don't like Stephanie Meyers? I've read a little of "Twilight," but I haven't dived (dove?) into her books...but I'm not sure why. My 13yo daughter would love to read Twilight, but I'm thinkin' it's a bit too sensual, ya know?
Anyway, tell me why you don't like 'em!
You make boring interesting.
"My beacon's been moved under moon and star..."
Don't hate me for liking Cotton Eyed Joe.
Facebook?
I don't have Facebook nor do I have a MySpace page. I am just not hip enough I don't think.
Your mom wants to be your friend? Tell your mom she can be your BFF if she'd take the kids for a weekend.
Then she could be all like in your fave five! Do they even have a fave five in Facebook? *shrugs* I dunno these things.
I'm with you on the facebook stuff. But I cannot follow you there on the Jonas Brothers. I just find those little curly headed buggers a wee bit creepy. And look how badly those MMMBop brothers aged...
I'm not on Facebook, but we definitely need to be friends. I'm more of a Kevin Jonas girl, and I gave up on Rick Springfield this year after I watched a Biography on him. But if you can overlook that, we can really hit it off. I rock at the Cotton Eyed Joe. Like I could win a dance off I am so good. And my husband and I often have our best discussions through text message. It can get interesting. We are soul sisters, you and I. And I mean that in the totally non-creepy sense.
Cocotte - I'm not sure if West Virginia is ready for me. When I really master Cotton Eye Joe, then I'll see about that trip. I won't kill time on that trip reading Stephenie Meyer books, though!
Phyllis - We had a square dance unit in elementary school. I remember how the boys hated it because they'd have to touch a girl's elbow!
Melissa - That damn Cha Cha Slide gets you every damn time!
Bunny - My parents took a disco dancing class through some adult ed. program when I was growing up, so I had the benefit of learning all those sweet moves in my living room watching them practice. I loved that video. It's exactly spot on!
1blueshi1 - Oh, honey, I totally love me some Deadliest Catch dudes, but a girl has to pace herself, and my porn channel (Discovery) was shoving them down my throat a little too much. I hope we can still be friends even though I've never watched a single episode of Law and Order!
Katie - Awww, you're too sweet! Thank you!
Bee - I can't bring myself to give up what little brain I have left after reading Twilight to even touch The Host. I have nothing but huge respect for you for even going to the new book!
Tool Man and I often IM each other from across the room, too. It's so sexy, but it is also the time when I shut off half my brain!
Bee - the Jonas Brothers are kids who have more money then I'll ever have in my lifetime. And I guess they can sing or something.
Claire - I'll get back to your other email soon! Ha! Um, I'm not always on the computer!
Black Hockey Jesus - That's very kind of you! So is your visit. Drop in anytime!
Therese - I can't hate you, ever, for (sigh) I can't hate this song much!
kimmy - My mom would be my BFF infinity if she took my kids for a few days. Maybe I'll write on her Facebook wall and ask her if she'd do that for me!
Manager Mom - Oh, I'll spot you on Zach and Isaac, but OMG, have you seen that cutie Taylor?! I'd cougar all over that Hanson!
April - You can totally have Kevin. He freaks me out with his one day straight/one day curly hair. He confuses me! I'd totally not fight a soul sister for him! Thanks for your visit and comment!
I've never gotten into Jonas Brothers, but I will confess to a frighteningly encyclopaedic knowledge of all things "Drake and Josh"
bunny - I'd be able to act out any episode with you. I am a master at the "Drake and Josh"!
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