...for a different kind of girl

silent surburban girl releasing her voice, not yet knowing what all she wants to say about her life and the things that make it spin. do you have to be 18 to be here? you'll know when i know.

Thursday, May 08, 2008

what i am is what i am

To prove that I'm not just a spinning orb of whining and raging sexiness, I'm dedicating this post to six things about myself that are uninteresting. Sadly, coming up with six things that meet that criteria wasn't that difficult. In fact, some of you may be inclined to refer back to the nearly 300 prior posts around here and say, "See? The times where you talked about your panties? Lame. And let's not forget your obsession with monkeys. That's just silliness!"

To which I say at least be nice when you say those things, please, and thank you for not rubbing in the fact that I'd like to rub my fact into Kevin Federline as exhibit A on your list of my uninterestingness!

One moment please....

....mmmm....Federline....

Ok, to task. I was asked to do this post by Mandy, and apparently it's one of those tags that is circling the blog world. With no further preamble, sit back, shake your head, and mutter "Hmmph. Uninteresting!" at the following:
  1. When I can't sleep and we have power at the castle, I'll lay in bed, look at the popcorn ceiling, and try to make out odd faces and shapes. I truly believe the face of Jesus is looking down upon me from the corner near where I toss my sensible shoes when I get undressed. In the middle of the room is a trio of clowns. After my eyes blur and I glance back up at ceiling Jesus, praying to him not to take my vision from me, I stay awake wondering how cool it would be to have an actual popcorn ceiling.
  2. When I was 11, I won a roller skating party for my class by being able to name the Little River Band's song Reminiscing in three notes. Yeah. I was just that cool.
  3. I feel obligated to finish every book I read, even if I decide the book sucks. Perhaps you'd feel that way, too, if you worked in a bookstore and thought the books would come to life and exact their revenge upon you if you didn't finish what you started. Maybe not. Maybe that last sentence should be it's own entry on this list. Anyway, I bought this book nearly three years ago, started reading it about a year later (eh, not my typical genre), and I have only 2 chapters left to finish it. Alas, I've not touched it in two years. I will, eventually, because the pages of books? I think they talk to each other, and dying via paper cut isn't my cup of tea.
  4. I still have the sweater I wore the night I met Tool Man. It's a hideous, long, salmon-colored monstrosity, and it's not like he touched me while I had it on or anything, but the fact that, out of everything, HE remembers what I wore that night made it special enough for me to save.
  5. I twirl and twist my hair almost constantly. It's a habit I've had since childhood, and used to be something I only did when I was tired or bored, but now I do it all the time, and I figure it beats smoking, which I've never done, ever.
  6. Magicians annoy me. Their stage banter is lame. Just once, magic man, how about not putting up the screen when the (finger quotes) blades (finger quotes) allegedly rip into your torso. Abracadabra. I think you suck.

Not you, of course. You all don't suck. I know that time I wrote about the pros and cons of being a vampire kind of sucked, but in all honesty, hello? It was a post about vampires! It was supposed to suck!

I'm sure I'm supposed to tag others to share their uninteresting qualities, but I typically find by the time I ever get these and get around to doing them, everyone else who publishes a blog has done it, so I'll just leave it to you to do with as you see fit in the event I'm not the last one.

Then leave me lots of nice, rambly comments, lest I whine again!

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20 Comments:

Blogger Backpacking Dad said...

Well, I still have a plastic 1.5L water bottle that my wife left in my apartment the first time we met. It has traveled across the continent twice, been up and down the state of California, previously held our assorted loose change, and then had the top cut off when we wanted to cash in that loose change a couple of years ago.

That moment, of cutting, was really quite bittersweet. Now it's a topless water bottle that doesn't hold anything or serve any purpose except permit me to be a sappy sappy bastard.

Friday, May 09, 2008 12:55:00 AM  
Blogger Sailor said...

You didn't succeed in being uninteresting in all six though, sorry.

I found it interesting that you have to finish books- I'd have thought the opposite, working in a bookstore you have the next one "always available", so you could toss the drivel aside.

Oh well, maybe next time you'll be less interesting. You can hope, anyway.

Friday, May 09, 2008 6:03:00 AM  
Blogger Bijoux said...

I found it fascinating that you could name a Little River Band song in three notes at age 11. I love to play Name That Tune with my husband and his old records. Does anyone remember "Prefab Sprout"? That's how boring we are!

Hey - I still have the first 45 I ever bought - Partridge Family's "I'll Meet You Halfway." Maybe I can sell it on ebay someday for loads of money?

Friday, May 09, 2008 6:24:00 AM  
Blogger 1blueshi1 said...

fadkog, even when you TRY to be uninteresting, you are interesting. I will never look at my popcorn ceilings the same way again (well, I will probably continue to wince away from them in fear, loathing, and the terrible finality of acknowlegement that I will never, no, never, spend the time and energy needed to scrape them off)

also, my kids have come up with something that will especially speak to you. come by!

Friday, May 09, 2008 7:30:00 AM  
Blogger Eternal Sunshine said...

Ditto for me on #1 - Except it's the bathroom wallpaper. There are dog faces and a baby deer in there. Makes me crazy.

#4. I still have the (now holey (not holy)) sweater and too-short pants that I wore the first night Budman and I went out. And I would completely get rid of them, but how can I when he says "Hey, I remember those" everytime he sees them?

I also do #5, although when I was little, it was something I did when I read, and when my fingers got too tangled to twist and twirl anymore, I would just rip out the hair. Must to my mother's chagrin, I had tiny little bald spots that grew in all spiky. That poor woman...

Friday, May 09, 2008 8:57:00 AM  
Blogger FTN said...

You can't use the word "panties" in a post about uninterestingness. You of all people should know the rule that panties automatically make anything interesting.

Friday, May 09, 2008 10:46:00 AM  
Blogger Desmond Jones said...

Uh, the bathroom-floor linoleum in our house also has some, uh, very interesting and 'impressionistic' random-shape-blobs in it, which I may or may not have spent idle hours on the toilet searching for 'faces' and other sundry items. . .

I have, on occasion, put a book away without reading it all the way thru, but I could probably count those on one hand (except that, if they were really all that bad, I've probably forgotten 'em, so how would I count 'em?). I totally understand you on that score. . .

Friday, May 09, 2008 11:58:00 AM  
Blogger Choppzs said...

I usually like to read others, but no play myself! lol

I hate magic shows too, but then again, I haven't been to a good one like in Vegas or anything, so that might be cool! Oh and Criss Angel, he's one mighty fine magician!!! I'd let him do his magic on me anyday!

Friday, May 09, 2008 12:11:00 PM  
Blogger kimmyk said...

i think that's so cool you still have the sweater.

i wish i had a lot of things that i had when i first met jamie.

namely my virginity.

Friday, May 09, 2008 5:14:00 PM  
Blogger Bee said...

I LOVE VAMPIRES!!
My fave is Edward Cullen. ;o)

I also have to finish every book I start even though some of the commentary while I'm reading it goes something like this "Oh my God!! Who gave this person money to write this crap!!"

Friday, May 09, 2008 10:40:00 PM  
Blogger Mandy said...

LOL... Thanks for doing the meme! I totally hear you on #3 because it was only a few years ago that I put a book down without finishing it. And the power, the pure power I felt in that act was exhilerating (sp?). Anyway. I now regularly throw books aside with such abandon that I've had to resort to the public library instead of the local bookstore. Good luck in your therapy!

Friday, May 09, 2008 11:30:00 PM  
Blogger Nature Girl said...

The first thing I thought was "oh man! Jesus heard her whining about the heat the other night" and then my second thought was "OH MAN! Jesus on the bedroom ceiling??? That's gotta put a damper on things!" (if ya know what I'm sayin') and then I thought...wow...she's not even close to being uninteresting! and then I thought..dang, I hate that song she referenced in the title and lables and now I've got it stuck in my head! Great! JUST Great!

and then I wondered who Edward Cullen was for not the first time today, so I took a moment, googled him, read the wikipedia blurb, and now I have to read the dang books. I don't even LIKE Vampires. They suck! Well..except for those Lost Boys. Love them. And then as I was closing I thought..Dang Stace..this just might be the rambliest of comments you've ever made!
And so it was.
Stacie

Saturday, May 10, 2008 12:31:00 AM  
Blogger Amanda said...

Oooh, I used to be right there with you on number 3, but a few truly abysmally written books freed me of that burden.

I love your popcorn Jesus dreamin'.
:)

Saturday, May 10, 2008 6:33:00 AM  
Blogger Therese in Heaven said...

Your "uninteresting things" list reminded me of something uninteresting about Liszt. (ha!)One of his major orchestra works, when diagramed completely, spells out abracadabra.

And now you see the uninteresting things that occupy my brain-space.

I think #4 is pretty interesting and sweet, btw.

Saturday, May 10, 2008 4:17:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I chew ice constantly. i have heard this is a sign of some kind of frustration, girl.

i have to read People magazine a certain way and then do the crossword puzzle before i read any article.

i have the same breakfast and lunch everyday.

so there you have some not so riveting things about me.

love you list, Diff Gal.

You have a very very Happy Mother's day, my blogger bud.

Saturday, May 10, 2008 7:53:00 PM  
Blogger Michael said...

Just focusing on #1 for a moment, have you considered putting your ceiling on eBay and retiring on the proceeds? Something to think about... ;-)

Saturday, May 10, 2008 9:49:00 PM  
Blogger Mandy Lou said...

I totally do #3 - and magicians do suck! Well and vampires too, but they can't help it, tight?

Saturday, May 10, 2008 10:24:00 PM  
Blogger kimmyk said...

Happy Mother's Day!!!

Sunday, May 11, 2008 6:42:00 AM  
Blogger Phyllis RenĂ©e said...

Popcorn ceilings--who came up with that idea?? They've haunted my sleep since I was a kid!

Sunday, May 11, 2008 8:25:00 AM  
Blogger for a different kind of girl said...

BP Dad - You sappy, sappy bastard! Totally sappy. Which is awesome. Sappy AND awesome!

Sailor - Maybe having all those book choices surrounding me has overwhelmed me. Or filled me with guilt. I see all those books that never get read and I think I have to give them some love!

Cocotte - As someone who still owns all her 45s an lps, I got a little tingle when I read that you recall the first single you bought. The first 45 I got was Blondie's Heart of Glass, and it was a gift from my uncle one Christmas. It impresses (yet mildly annoys) my kids that I can sing along to damn near every song we hear, anywhere.

1blueshi1 - As one who abhors popcorn ceilings (especially vaulted ones she had to climb ladders to paint and she is terrified of heights!), I don't like to look at them much either, but that Ceiling Jesus keeps calling me!

Melody - Growing up, we had pink and white swirled tile in the bathroom of our house. I spent a lot of time in there, putting make up on out of my Caboodle, and getting freaked by the fat, sweaty guys and mean old ladies, and creepy looking kids faces I could make out of the swirls. And don't get me started on the monkey faces!

FTN - Imagine the chaos I could have unleashed had I used BOOBS! instead!

Des - If the Ceiling Jesus hadn't convinced me it was impossile to believe such things, I'd firmly believe that bathroom flooring harbors many evil images!

Choppzs - I'll let you and kimmy keep your Criss Angel. When I saw him on Oprah, I couldn't help but make the "Gah! Magician banter!" face as he was talking. He does have some mighty impressive highlights, though!

kimmy - Slayed me, girl!

Bee - That was pretty much the gist of my commentary as I was fighting my way through "Twilight" and Edward Cullen. I abhor that book. I found it so awful. My heart goes out to you for putting money down for "The Host"!

Mandy - One day I hope to have the power of which you speak! I wish I had it as I was griping my way through "Twilight"! I aspire to this!

Stacie - Sometimes, in the OTHER THINGS department, I like to think of Ceiling Jesus as a soul singer providing a sexy soundtrack to the OTHER THINGS. That sexy song wouldn't include "What I Am," of course, but it's tolerable! What's not tolerable? The stories of Edward Cullen and Bella! I URGE you NOT to start reading them. Please! For me! LAME!!! But that's just my opinion! Lost Boys vampires don't suck. Edward Cullen SUCKS!

Amanda - I think this year I should work on my book guilt. I'll pray to the Ceiling Jesus about it!

Therese - I love that you have stuff like that swirling in your head. That kind of stuff (well, not that one!) takes up the most space in my brain!

Katie - OMG. I scan a magazine for one or two specific articles I want to read, then read the magazine cover to cover, saving those one or two for last. And I often eat the same things for breakfast and lunch until I find I have to get out of the rut. I fall into it again pretty fast, though! We're oh so riveting!

Michael - Ha! More than once, my friend More than once!

Mandy Lou - Vampires so can't help it. Neither can those of us who have to see a book through to the end! They say we can break out of this book guilt, but I just don't know...

kimmy - Thank you!

Phyllis - No kidding, right!? I also think bathroom tile apes root my fear of Bigfoots!

Monday, May 12, 2008 9:07:00 AM  

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