...for a different kind of girl

silent surburban girl releasing her voice, not yet knowing what all she wants to say about her life and the things that make it spin. do you have to be 18 to be here? you'll know when i know.

Thursday, December 27, 2007

'against the sharks, we need every man we got'


Shark Week continues with Episode 2 - "The Sharks'll steer clear"
If you're a follower of sharks, and who among us isn't, you know that sharks must keep moving or they die. They collect their victims by stunning them, maybe gnawing on bits and pieces of them, and then hunting for another.
And there's always another victim. The silly ones swim right up to them and show off their sparkly fins and trick eyes meant to deter predators. Silly, silly fish.
They're kind of like the boys up there in the picture, which prompst me to ask you:
(A) Romantic B-movie prison love story?
or
(B) "The best Christmas presents ever (since I'm apparently never gonna get a Wii)!!" as dubbed by a 10 year old boy?
I'm opting for men's prison love story. The looks on their faces speak to their torment and rage. Especially that last guy, with his head tilted down to convey the shame and unspeakable horror that shoplifting a Snickers from his hometown Pump and Pass brought him. You better believe the next time - oh, if there is a next time - he gets a hankerin' to satisfy his sweet tooth, he's gonna think twice about the price his need for peanuts and caramel cost him.
If he doesn't get shanked in the shower first.
Or bitten by a shark.

12 Comments:

Blogger Kelly said...

But you didn't say anything about sharks doing ballet moves through the streets of New York City and singing songs about America. Doesn't Shark Week cover that?

Thursday, December 27, 2007 11:58:00 AM  
Blogger Recovering Soul said...

That's the same toy Therese asked for, and she's been upstairs making kissy noises all day. What does it all mean?

Thursday, December 27, 2007 3:30:00 PM  
Blogger 1blueshi1 said...

does this prison need any new female guards? I could fit in a second job...with purely altruistic motives, of course.

Thursday, December 27, 2007 3:36:00 PM  
Blogger Nanette said...

Always another victim. Usually some poor defenseless hottie minding their own business out to sea on a surfboard--at least that is what the movies would like us to believe. Hmmmph.

I vote A)! At least they can now finally admit their desire for another cockadoodle doo without having to admit that they might possibly desire the ol' cockadoodle doo outside of those four walls.

Shark week rules!

ilvckgvass

Thursday, December 27, 2007 6:21:00 PM  
Blogger Bee said...

I miss the days when I knew who the wrestlers were! The one on the end looks familiar...

Thursday, December 27, 2007 10:23:00 PM  
Blogger Scarlett Wanna Be said...

Hey, is there a law about prisoners not having nipples? Seriously? I see the detail in the abs and neck muscles, but where are the velvet buttons?

Thursday, December 27, 2007 10:57:00 PM  
Blogger kimmyk said...

oh sharks are crafty sneaky fish. you don't notice them....lurking....then the music starts...it's always the same music too...it lures you in and make you feel like swaying to a fro and then....*BAM*...the shark bites you in the ass. but then the really cool thing happens...an even bigger shark comes along and eats that shark. i've seen that happen...i hope that happens this week on shark week. love shark week.

that secondly player right there-he looks like a cracked out criss angel. i useta love me some criss but then he dyed his hair blonde and got all girlie on me...i can't do girlie men...i have pride ya know.

Friday, December 28, 2007 5:55:00 AM  
Blogger for a different kind of girl said...

kelly - it should be noted that during the prisoners' one hour of free time in the morning, they break out into elaborate ballet productions, which they alternate with finger snaps and fake fights. it's quite a spectacle!

RS - Means you gave her the kind of Christmas gift that just keeps on giving, mister!

1blueshi1 - I think you're describing an entirely different type of prison movie there, missy!

Nan - I say just caste off all the false uniforms and lame requests and embrace the cockadoodle doo like we all know these prisoners want to. Oh, I bet they'd crow buckets if they did...

Bee - The wrestlers today all look so shiny from the fake sweat that I worry about their thyroids or something. My oldest can't tell you what I asked him to do for chores this morning (cause he didn't do them at all!) but he can tell you all the names of the wrestlers and their belt wins. The one in the front? After inquiring, that is John Cena. I shall now refer to all wrestlers as John Cena.

Scarlett - Oh, and I will speak of their 'velvet buttons.' It is with great joy that I realize blogging has expanded my vocabulary so richly. First 'squirrel covers' and now 'velvet buttons'! I'm a happy girl. My velvet buttons might be perky! No one, though, especially sharks or plastic, rippled men, are gonna see them, though!

kimmy - sharks like to play the moody music or the part of the tortured artist, that's for sure. they like their music loud to muffle out the cries of their victims. And you'd think with the shark warnings posted all over the place, there'd be fewer victims, but sigh....apparently people get mesmerized by the sharks and their shiny, pointy teeth. That biting in the ass thing is a specialty, that's for sure.

I pray for a bigger shark to come along and gulp up the smaller shark. You know no idea how much.

And yeah, that one dude does look like Criss, but I agree. Dude gets some highlights and some new eyeliner at the M.A.C. counter and he suddenly starts covorting with Oprah. That's a mind freak right there, baby!

Friday, December 28, 2007 4:09:00 PM  
Blogger Melissa said...

Oh, it's A. No doubt about it. John Cena seems particularly enthusiastic.

Friday, December 28, 2007 7:47:00 PM  
Blogger for a different kind of girl said...

Melissa - Old John there looks the happiest of them all, really, with his brooding, yet quasi-welcoming yell. Must be why he gets to wear the fancy pants belt there!

Monday, December 31, 2007 10:25:00 AM  
Blogger FTN said...

If it's not a prison love story, it's my freshman year at college. Half the guys on my floor in our dorm were wrestlers. And they walked around naked most of the time, with that look on their faces.

I bet someone could sell that fancy belt for a few packs of smokes in the joint.

Wednesday, January 02, 2008 12:31:00 PM  
Blogger for a different kind of girl said...

FTN - That's like a direct to DVD movie you've just described. The kind I'd sit up and watch because the Discovery Channel was nothing but reruns.

Thursday, January 03, 2008 9:30:00 AM  

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