...for a different kind of girl

silent surburban girl releasing her voice, not yet knowing what all she wants to say about her life and the things that make it spin. do you have to be 18 to be here? you'll know when i know.

Monday, February 15, 2010

some fancy book learnin'

I quote from the poet Mick Jagger when I say "You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, well, you just might find you get what you need," when I share with you that my favorite customer at the bookstore today was the lady who visited this afternoon to exchange a copy of Surviving Infidelity for a copy of Moregasm. If the title of the latter doesn't give it all away, the subtitle lets you know that in your hands is 'a guide for mind-blowing sex.'

Of course, if you're doing it all with your hands, you might want to read the book again. Or get out more.

(say hi, Seth, my rascally inner 14 year old boy!)

(...'sup)

I wanted to fist bump this particular lady and wish her well, but she was in a bit of a rush. Who can blame her, really? Hello? MOREGASMS!! (pssst - a tip, lady...don't rush those!). Instead I smiled and sent her on her way. So, mysterious lady on the path for mind blowing sex, I wish you well. May you be treated to better results than some of my own past literary love notes have given me.

p.s. - I thought about quoting one William Idol, who said it second best behind Mick Jagger when he said "In the midnight hour, she cried more, more, more" (or, really, any line from that particular song), but I have to be honest. Rebel Yell ranks just millimeters below my disdain for his version of Mony, Mony. In fact, both songs cause me to make a face that those seeking to either invoke or receive moregasms would be immediately turned off by. No one's a winner when I'm a whiner.

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24 Comments:

Anonymous Twenty Four At Heart said...

Wow, thanks for the tip (so to speak)! What a perfect gift to give next time I'm invited to a wedding.
Moregasms!

Tuesday, February 16, 2010 7:09:00 AM  
Blogger Craig said...

Gee, when I quote Mick Jagger to my kids, I always refer to him as a great Moral Philosopher. . .

And I've bought a sex book or two in my day, and there's always that slightly awkward moment (especially if the cashier is a young woman roughly the age of one of my daughters) of *wink-wink, nudge-nudge* and (*ahem*) and "OK, yeah, here's my credit card. . ."

Tuesday, February 16, 2010 8:17:00 AM  
Anonymous TwoBusy said...

Billy Idol hears what you're saying about him. And he's not happy.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010 8:22:00 AM  
Blogger lime said...

hey, i like billy idol....

and now i'm off to amazon.com

thanks!

Tuesday, February 16, 2010 8:52:00 AM  
Blogger The Savage said...

You should watch Billy Idol sing Plastic Jesus on You Tube....

In FADKOG I lust....

Tuesday, February 16, 2010 9:12:00 AM  
Anonymous PattiMcKenna said...

Moregasms! Personal development and self help have finally broke through our sexual barriers! Great title, a dream title for marketing!

Tuesday, February 16, 2010 9:29:00 AM  
Blogger Amy@Bitchin'WivesClub said...

I am afraid of the potential fall-out, but doubt that I will be able to resist adding "No one's a winner when I'm a whiner" to the family lexicon.

Moregasms!!!!

Tuesday, February 16, 2010 9:32:00 AM  
Blogger Christina Lee said...

HAH!!! love it!

Tuesday, February 16, 2010 9:39:00 AM  
Blogger Meg said...

I think Moregasms would help just about anybody Survive Infidelity so good for her!

Tuesday, February 16, 2010 10:33:00 AM  
OpenID tysdaddy said...

I was gonna say what Meg said, so . . . what Meg said.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010 10:58:00 AM  
Blogger Cocotte said...

WHAT? So, you're saying you don't like Billy Idol??

Tuesday, February 16, 2010 11:04:00 AM  
Blogger Brian o vretanos said...

I was slightly shocked to see that Barnes and Noble sell used copies of Moregasm...

Tuesday, February 16, 2010 12:31:00 PM  
Blogger Pat said...

Geez, I didn't know Moregasm, the sequel was out yet. I'm still reading Anygasm. I'm getting old, ya know, so it takes longer for me.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010 1:03:00 PM  
Blogger Mike said...

I have the same disdain for Mr. Idol as you do. However, what was the age of said lady who was shopping in your store? Not that age should have anything to do with orgasms, but opportunity could be an issue....

Tuesday, February 16, 2010 1:17:00 PM  
Blogger CT Mom said...

Um, that's interesting fare they're now selling in the children's section... ;-)

Tuesday, February 16, 2010 5:16:00 PM  
Blogger steenky bee said...

If I may be so bold, let me also quote Sir Mick, "It burns when I pee."

Oh come on. You KNOW he's said that before.

Meet me at McDonalds. I want to share a McFlurry with you.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010 7:47:00 PM  
Blogger bernthis said...

what I would have paid to see you fist bump this chick.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010 12:07:00 AM  
Blogger Indigo said...

Moregasm? I assume it comes with wipe easy pages n cover?;@

Wednesday, February 17, 2010 4:34:00 PM  
Blogger Kate Coveny Hood said...

All I have to say is that he must have had SOME excuse to deserve that turn around in priorities...

Wednesday, February 17, 2010 4:50:00 PM  
Blogger Chag said...

I'll give you Mony Mony, but how can any rational person and child of the 80s hate Rebel Yell?

We might have to break up.

Thursday, February 18, 2010 9:27:00 AM  
Blogger The Stiletto Mom said...

I want to fist bump her too...and I'll do that right after I get back from Barnes and Noble. :)

Thursday, February 18, 2010 4:36:00 PM  
Anonymous the weirdgirl said...

That lady IS awesome. I'd try to think up something witty but all your other comments summed it up.

Friday, February 19, 2010 1:54:00 PM  
Blogger anymommy said...

I want to work with you at the bookstore. Also, @indigo cracked my butt up. I want to have thought of that comment.

Friday, February 19, 2010 4:32:00 PM  
Blogger Legallyblondemel said...

I always laugh at some (most) point during your posts; this time it was "William Idol" that really got me.

As I like to tell people, working in a general bookstore is one of the best opportunities out there for human behavior insight - or going with the theme of this post, "moresight"?

Monday, February 22, 2010 11:34:00 AM  

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